Monday, September 16, 2013

Connor starts big boy school

Connor, aged 4.5 years.  Picture taken 21 Aug 2013

Connor started school on 21 Aug.  A few days before, I ironed his newly bought school uniforms - white polo shirts and grey trousers.  I remember my mum doing the same for us until we were old enough to iron our own uniforms.  We'd just returned from a long weekend away in Liverpool where we'd bought his black school shoes and the plimsolls for gym at the Clarks outlet store in Cheshire Oaks.  I packed his green school bag with a snack box and his PE kit bag.  Being Malaysian, I am accustomed to school bags bursting at the seams with books so I was a little doubtful when I realised there was not much else to go in his bag.

The next morning, I woke up at 6am to get everything ready.  Breakfast for my little man was toast with Nutella, a mug of hot chocolate and a half-boiled egg.  The half-boiled eggs are a complete mystery to my husband but they mean a lot to me.  My mum would make us half-boiled eggs every morning before we went off to school.  It was her way of saying "I love you".   And so I make them for my little boy every morning before he goes to school, just like my mum did for my brothers and me.

I took this pic on our front doorstep before we got into the car.  Connor doesn't realise it but this is effectively the end of carefree childhood for him.  From now on, this is serious school.  You can't just skip a week because Mummy and Daddy want to take you for a fun trip to Barcelona as you can in nursery. 

At school, there were plenty of parents armed with cameras and smartphones, ready to record this moment.  Our little ones ran about in the school playground while we parents stood around and chatted about how our summer holidays went.  

Finally, the school bell rang and all the older kids, who'd been through this before, ran up and lined up patiently.  Our little ones however were perplexed.  I guided Connor into one line and gave him a goodbye kiss and hug.

The teachers all came out and we had a little welcome back speech from the head.  Then class by class, our children all marched off into school.

I watched my son walk off with the rest.  I caught it on video.  He was carrying his bag and he seemed happy enough to follow everyone else.  I felt proud and happy that he wasn't nervous but at the same time, I felt really emotional.  It didn't seem that long ago that he was holding my hand learning to walk in the compound of our housing area in Kemang, Jakarta.  I still remember that day, he was about 10 months old or so and I had decided to take him out for a walk.  He was cackling away with glee at being allowed out and I remember I had to lean over a little to hold his hand because he was so little.  It was such a happy day and such a happy memory for me.  

When I watched him walk away, I knew he wasn't just walking into school.  I knew he was also walking away from his babyhood and I knew I would never have those times back again.  I felt like a part of me walked away into school with him.  

I'm so glad I was lucky enough to have spent the past 4.5 years having him all to myself.  I got to see every milestone, I got to kiss away every tear.  It was just Mummy and Connor for so long.  I was there for everything and he was my whole world until his little brother came along and my whole world expanded.  

Goodbye my baby.  I know you'll love school.  

Be a good boy, listen to teacher and have fun.

And when school ends, Mummy will be right out here waiting for you. 


  1. Hi been following your blog for a while now. Your last few sentences brought tears. They grow up so fast, dont they?

    1. They do indeed. There was a group of us mums waving goodbye to our firstborns walking off into big school and every one of us had a little cry after and then laughed at each other for being so emotional.

  2. Oh my, look at him all grown up now! You know, this is the obligatory first day at school picture we all had. I'm sure you remember it. You in your freshly ironed uniform, standing at the front door of the house. I know I remember mine! :D

    1. I only remember the one at kindy.. you, me, Raymond, Eddie and Daffy. I still have that pic and every time I look at it, I think...... WTF is Raymond doing there???


  3. congrats - a milestone for the boy, as is another for you. happy birthday & have a really good one. (muak!)

    & how appropriate - Reds at the dizzy heights atop the Premier League.

    life's good, yes?


    1. Thank you for the birthday wishes!

      Giddy with the joy of being near the top of the EPL... but I don't think we have the stuff against the better teams. Non-existent midfield. Will be happy to see Arsenal win it.

  4. You haven't posted anything in a long time! hope all is well with you.

    1. Hello there, thank you for your post! The reality of being a mum of two kids is killing me. ;) Hence the long silence!