My beautiful sons

Connor aged 4.5yo with Anders, 2 weeks old

Connor had just returned home from Nursery and asked to hold his baby brother.  And of course baby brother chose that moment to start bawling really, really LOUDLY.

Connor is delighted to have a little brother as you may have guessed from his big smile.  He's been a really good big brother, cooing to him and telling him, "Anders, don't cry... don't cry..." every time the wee one chooses to yowl.  And most of all, he has been very patient and understanding when I can't attend to his needs immediately as I used to before Anders arrived.  It has made my life so much easier as I'm still struggling to establish any sort of routine.

I love you both, my beautiful sons.

Yay, we finally have a name!

Yes!  We have a name for Number Two!  At last!

Back when we didn't know if Number Two would be wearing pink or blue, we'd agreed quite early on a girl's name.  We both liked Ayva, I loved the sound of the name.

But we couldn't find a boy's name that we liked.  I trawled through pages and pages of online baby name sites with no success.  Some of the names suggested were really weird.  In this day and age, who on earth names their son Gaylord?  I liked Tyler but it was too American.  I found myself weirdly fixated on Ashton for a while and couldn't imagine why until I realised that our neighbours' grandson is Ashton.  So scratch that.

One of my favourites, Rafe, was met with hoots of derisive laughter.  These philistines I live with!  They said it was too posh a name for a village boy.  Okay lor....  Asher, Gage, Chace, Chance were similarly dismissed.

When we knew Number Two would be a boy, I got REALLY desperate.  With Connor, we had picked his name well before I entered my third trimester.  With Number Two, he was still nameless with just 8 weeks to go!

As I did with Connor, I also trawled through sites that suggested Danish names so as to pay homage to Dear Hubby's Faroese ancestry.  His great-great-(great?)-grandfather was called Hans Christian... boy, that's a real Danish name if there ever was one!  I found a few that didn't meet with hoots of laughter from my husband.

Today we've finally settled on a rather Danish name and it has been met with approval by my mother-in-law.  My married name is originally Danish and the spelling was anglicised some generations back to fit in with their new lives in England.  I think it's going to be really amusing if Number Two comes out inheriting my Chinese features but possessing a totally Danish-sounding name!  I know how it feels like because when people see my first name + married name, they always get a big surprise when they see me because it suggests someone who's tall, blonde and blue-eyed... you know, sterotype Nordic person.  No, it's me!  Average height, rice-eating, dark-haired, dark-eyed me!  HAHA!

We'll wait till Number Two arrives before unveiling it.  I think I might just choose a back-up name... just in case Number Two really does look 100% Chinese!

My 2nd pregnancy: 32 weeks

Well, the pregnancy tracker app we downloaded ding-donged merrily on Dear Hubby's iPhone and told me that I'm now 32 weeks along.  Which means there's only 8 weeks before Number Two pops out.

And this was my reaction:

Image credit:  Original image from picturesdepot.com

Where did all that time go!

I'm not ready to be a mum to TWO kids!

Three if you count Dear Hubby!

Too late.   He's coming.  At least we got:

1.  his clothes and bedding washed

2.  some cold weather gear ready just in case

3.  my old breast pump and steriliser set washed and checked

4.  prams dusted and cleaned

What else?  Hmmm... I'll find out soon enough I guess!

Number Two's gender

For those of you who are still trying to figure out the scans I posted... the colour of this snowsuit I bought should give you the answer.

And Baby Number Two is.....

.....a boy?

Or a girl?

Can you tell from this scan?  Teehee.

A closer look at Number Two!

When I was pregnant with Connor, I got to see scans of him at every monthly check-up in Jakarta with my gynae.  The system works differently here in the UK.  I see a midwife (no gynae!) every month for a check-up and all they do is check blood/urine samples, check my tummy measurements (which is a good indicator of baby's growth) and then listen to the heartbeat.  The only scan I received was at 20 weeks where they did a very detailed check of the baby to see that all the bits are in place and no obvious abnormalities are present.

We finally caved in to my maternal anxieties last week and signed up for a private scan so that I could see the baby and reassure myself that Number Two was doing well.

And here is Number Two!

The scan's quite clear as it's quite obviously the image of a baby snoozing.  Number Two was snoozing when the scans started and stayed stubbornly that way despite the sonographer's best efforts.

The image below is of Connor at 23 weeks gestation and boy, the two sure look alike!  I dunno - do all babies look like this in utero?  Or is it just mine?  Connor emerged looking EXACTLY like he did in the womb so we think Number Two will look a lot like big brother as the scans look pretty much alike.

Image on original post back in 2008

Happily, Number Two is doing well.  All the main bits are there, we counted 10 digits on the hands, feet are all perfectly formed, facial features are all there and everything seems to be in place.  The heartbeat was strong and steady and the baby's been kicking away merrily (except at the scan!).

Like all mothers, I pray that my little one will be born safe, normal and healthy... that's all we really, really care about.  Things like impossible cuteness and Einstein-like IQ are just icing on the cake.

I was so happy and relieved to be able to see our baby for the first time.  This is the first time I got to see Number's Two face in 3D and it was such a relief to know all is well.

As a result, I was full of goodwill towards men all weekend.  Hehe.

President Obama and his mysterious effect on pregnancies

You know... I spent my last night as a non-mommy watching Obama win his first election in Nov 2008, watching the celebrations on telly in my hospital suite in Jakarta.  I was so happy to see his win, so happy to celebrate the first US president from a minority.  The next day, our son was born.

Last year, we followed Obama's re-election campaign with great interest as well.  As most of the world celebrated his re-election with relief, Dear Hubby and I found ourselves in a very familiar situation as we stared at the positive result on the pregnancy test I'd just taken.

Hmmm.

All I can say is - what a good thing this is Obama's last term!  We can't afford any more kids!

SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Indeed.  

Ladies and gentlemen, this is our Number Two and Number Two is due in June 2013.  We were caught completely off-guard when we realised that we would be parents to yet another little one as we hadn't planned it.  At all!

I am now 21 weeks pregnant so I'm halfway through the pregnancy.  I had been so worried about the baby as I had been under a lot of stress with my UK visa shenanigans and the whole move and travel thing but thankfully she has been thriving and is doing very well.  We don't know the gender of the baby yet as it's the policy of our hospital to not tell parents but we're calling the baby a "she" for simplicity's sake.  

Connor has no idea what's in store. Narf, narf.   I know this as I'm speaking as an eldest child who had her world turned upside down by the arrival of a little brother. 

19 weeks more to go and I'll have another little one to cuddle and love.  

It's all good.

Happy birthday Gong-gong!

It was Gong-gong's birthday on Tues. We weren't planning a trip back to see my parents as they had planned to come to KL this weekend. But on Monday, they called up and said they couldn't make it this weekend. I was quite disappointed as my younger brother and I were planning to take them out for a feast to celebrate their birthdays.

I then thought about driving home on Tues to celebrate Dad's birthday. But it would be such a hassle, driving home for just the one-night stay and having to lug Connor's toys and various baby stuff along in the car as well. Don't even start about the cost of the fuel and toll for the trip. Oh bother. I thought "Too much hassle. I'll wait till they come to KL and we'll take them out. Connor can celebrate with them next year."

Then I thought to myself "What if...?" What if we were posted to Siberia come end of this year? (Unlikely but...) What if we decided to move to Canada like we were talking about? What if... what if... what if this was Dad's chance to celebrate his birthday for the first time with his first grandson and we didn't take it?

I decided I didn't want to live my life asking what-if's questions.

So I threw in clothes, toys, baby wipes, diapers, water bottles, sippy cups, make up kit, shower cap etc etc into a suitcase and we hopped into the car. A couple of hours later and I glided the car to my parents' front gate. I got out as quietly as I could and got Connor out of his car seat. I handed him the birthday card I'd gotten for his grandad and told him to hold it.

"Shhh... c'mon Connor.... let's go look for Gong-gong!" My plan was to sneak up on my parents and surprise them. (They didn't know we were making the drive back)

But we'd made so much noise opening the gate and Connor was by now giggling and shrieking with laughter so they heard us and had come out to investigate. There's my dad opening the sliding doors that lead to my childhood home. "It's CONNOR! Look, Connor's back!" (Yes and me too, Dad) There's my son, laughing, waving the birthday card excitedly in his hand and breaking into a run towards his grandfather.

I watched my dad scoop my little boy up into his arms for a hug. I watched my mum come running out from the dining room to hug and kiss Connor. I watched Connor laugh with delight, happy to see his grandparents again.

There are some things money just can't buy. This was one of them.

What if..?

I'm glad I don't have the answer.

Happy birthday Papa.


(A Gong-gong is Chinese for grandfather. It is not pronounced as "gong" as in "He won the gong for best actor". I have no idea how to explain it. Go grab a local Chinese in your neighbourhood and ask. Hehe)

Baby Sign Language: Eat and Drink

One of the earliest signs I taught Connor was "eat" and "drink". They're very useful signs and very easy to teach because there is no motivator like hunger. (Money hasn't quite entered Connor's realm of thought yet)

On our first night in Luz, Connor refused his dinner. He'd not been eating well that day as well as we were travelling. It was very frustrating trying to feed him and having him just clamp his mouth shut or spit everything out. Finally I gave up and put him to bed. I thought he'd wake up multiple times in the night crying for milk but he didn't.

The next morning, Dear Hubby and I were woken up at 6am by our little monkey. "Mummy, Mummy!" he said and signed "Help". I replied "Yes Connor, Mummy will help you. What do you want?" He said again, more desperately this time "Mummy!" and in quick succession signed "eat" and "drink".

We burst out laughing. Dear Hubby said "Well I guess someone is finally hungry!" And he was. He ate a whole lot of cereal and yoghurt that morning.

From the mouth of babes: Motorbike

About 2 days ago as I was busy preparing breakfast for Connor, he sailed by gleefully on his little trike. I smiled and said "Oh look, there goes Connor on his bicycle!"

Connor stopped, turned and looked at me as if I were daft. In a loud clear voice, he said "Momobike." (motorbike)

Ah. I see.

I stand corrected, my son.

Buying a stroller: Some points to consider

Since my friend and soon-to-be yummy mummy Shortcake is expecting, I've been thinking back about all those things I wish I knew before I bought some baby stuff. I know this is a little too late for you, Shortcake but I hope it'll come in useful for Baby Number Two! ;)

Buying a stroller is far more confusing than signing up to a telco plan. Some of you Malaysians may remember that fantastic Digi phone ad on confusing phone plans (Plan A got this, Plan B got that... etc etc... chee mou?) and buying a stroller is just like that.

What you should really do is look at your lifestyle, your space constraints, your budget and then look at the strollers that fit those criteria. Not start off with "Oh, should I get a Maclaren or a Quinny?" and work backwards from there, which was what I did.

Ask yourself:
- Do you take your baby out a lot alone? Or just on the weekends with the hubby? I liked our old stroller because it was light and easy for me to handle since I was usually alone with Connor.
- Do you take your baby out to the parks a lot? You might need something that can handle uneven ground. If all the walking you do is confined to the malls, you don't need a stroller that has those fancy pneumatic wheels.
- Do your grocery shopping with the baby? Then you'll appreciate a sturdy stroller with a large shopping basket. Ever tried hanging shopping bags on the stroller handle, taking your baby out to put him in the car seat and having all your shopping and stroller tip over? I haven't either but I saw it happen right in front of me. Try retrieving that your tins from under the car. Not fun.
- Is your car boot big enough for your stroller? Funny how this doesn't quite hit some people until AFTER they buy the stroller. If your boot space < stroller + shopping + bags, then either buy a bigger car or buy a smaller stroller.
- Can you handle the stroller? Not talking about just wheeling it around but you have to remember you're going to be folding/unfolding and lifting it into the car boot for a long time to come. I am besar dan sihat but I can imagine a very slight, petite mum might have probs with our current stroller.
- Do you have space in the house for the stroller? A question to consider especially if you live in a condo. Toddler + stroller = Wow, Mummy this is the BIGGEST push toy I've ever had! Wheee!!! *crash!*
- A question some people never ask themselves: Is the stroller big enough for your baby? The Combi was supposed to last Connor till he's 2yo but he outgrew that before he turned one and Connor's not even big.
- Does it have the Zzz Factor? If it does, yay! Add 2 more hours to your shopping time! Shopping + Sleeping toddler = maxed out credit card


Our first stroller was a Combi travel system (ie stroller +car seat). I picked a travel system because we travel mostly by car. All we had to do once we arrived at our destination was to pick up the car seat, with Connor usually still asleep in it, and click it on the stroller frame. Ta-dah! Connor's sleep was undisturbed and I could shop in peace.

Once he outgrew the Combi, we bought a Phil & Ted's Vibe. Why?
- Safe and comfy for Connor
- Has some Zzz Factor. Crucial because I can only shop for clothes when he's asleep. He's male. Hates clothing stores.
- BIG basket underneath to stash all my grocery shopping and diaper bag. Great because I'm usually alone with Connor and this means I don't have to haul all the bags myself.
- Very sturdy, can't see it tipping over. Never tried though!
- Height-adjustable handle. Very useful because there is an 8" difference in height between Mummy and Daddy.
- Very easy to maneuver despite its size
- Doesn't rattle the heck out of Connor when I take him off-road to the park
- On SALE! Teehee... got it like 40% off. Otherwise I never would have considered it.
- The company is called Phil & Ted's Most Excellent Buggy Company. Dude, how la to not buy from a company with such a good sense of humour!
- For those of you who care, it is not bad in the stylo-mylo stakes. It's not something high up on my list though otherwise I would have plumped for the Stokke Xplory.

In other words, it fitted our lifestyle, our budget (post-sale price), our baby and we had the space for it.

Cons: Bulky, have to always carry my bicycle pump around for the pneumatic wheels, had to give up buying a Suzuki Swift because cannot masuk boot (I like driving small cars), harness a bit fiddly, bloody expensive without sale.


I don't really bother with the accessories because I don't use them. Stuff like the raincover, sunshade... don't meet a lot of mums in KL who wheel their babes out and about in the tropical heat and rains. One accessory I found really useful is the fan. It's got foam blades so it doesn't hurt the little one and makes a lot of sense in our weather. Another good one to get is the bottle holder. Everything else goes into the stroller basket.

So before you buy your stroller, think about some of the questions I've listed above. I've asked myself some of those questions, some were asked by fellow newbie mums. Take your list of answers into the store when you're shopping.

Happy shopping!

Baby Equipment Hire in Kuala Lumpur

If you're coming to Kuala Lumpur for a holiday (Liza and Mia, are you reading this!!! ARGH! Hehe), this may be of some help to you. I found this site when we were living in Jakarta and making frequent trips back to KL so I was looking to hire car seats for just a week or two. I'm not sure if car seats are mandatory in Malaysia but knowing what crazy drivers we are, I didn't want Connor bouncing along unprotected even for a minute. This is why I don't take taxis in KL anymore. No car seat, no go.

The site is called Baby Barn and it also sells new and pre-loved baby items. I took a look and they rent out travel cots, strollers and car seats. They also have a hiking carrier - good if you're planning an outing to Batu Caves!

Their latest item is pretty interesting. It's called the Sit n Stroll. This is something I've rarely seen. It's a car seat and stroller all in one. Ever tried lugging a car seat through an airport? We have. Even though it was our pretty light Combi car seat, it was still a pain. With this one, you just wheel the car seat around just like a stroller. So clever hor!!!

Here you go, Scott and Elaine. I hope the site's what you're looking for and I hope you'll be having a wonderful holiday in Malaysia soon.

Car seats: What to look for

When buying a car seat, this is what you should look for.

I call it the Zzz Factor. It is the ability of a car seat to make your child feel sleepy within 5 minutes of popping him in.

Serious.

Take it from a mum of a toddler. A mum who drives quite a lot. A mum who's had to endure long distance drives with him. Whether it's a macet situation in Jakarta or the M... whatever number dual carriageway that takes us from Liverpool to Scotland, there is no bliss like a quiet, sleeping child in the back seat of a car.

If you buy a car seat from a reputable manufacturer like your Maxi-Cosis and Britaxes, they're made to the required safety standards. So I don't think safety would be an issue here unless you're scrimping and buying a car seat from oh I don't know... Uncle and Aunty Car Seat Sdn Bhd. As we drive around a lot, a car seat was one that I knew we would not compromise on. We bought one from Recaro, I think it's the Signo. Dear Hubby's reasoning was that Recaro make excellent car seats for big boys so they should also make excellent ones for little boys. It wasn't cheap even after a 20% discount and for the longest time, I wondered if I'd gone overboard with this "My one and only son! I need him to be safe!" bit.

Then we went to the UK for a holiday and since we needed a car seat for only 2+ weeks, we bought a basic one from Argos. It cost us $45 (quid... not dollars but I don't have the pound sign on my keyboard) vs $200+ (quids again) that we paid for our Recaro. It was basic, it got the job done ie kept Connor safe. But it did not have the Zzz Factor. So when we did our annual Liv-Aberdeen drive, Connor was quite the pain in the rear.... seat. When we were finally back in KL and Connor was safely harnessed into his Recaro again, it was Dear Hubby, not I, who said "Thank god we bought this car seat."

Forget the cup holder. Car seat toys, snacks, drinks... okay, but they only keep the bub quiet for so long. What you need is a total knocked-out snoring child for driving bliss. Unfortunately, you can't test the Zzz Factor out in the store but I guess a nicely padded car seat would be a good indication of its Zzz Factor.

You've been warned.

(This is not a paid post. Just an expression of my relief that the money we paid for this Recaro seat was well spent after all. Phewww...)

Eye Candy: Who's afraid of the big bad waves?

(I don't know how to rotate the video. I'm looking for programs to rotate it but the one I found was virus-infested and was removed from the download site. If any techies out there can help me out, I'd be very grateful)

This is Connor, aged 19 months old and at the beach for the first time ever in his life. He'd never known a pool so vast and surely never imagined a pool with water that could play chase with you.

This video was shot on our 2nd day in Luz so Connor was still unsure about how waves worked. Tell you what though, he worked out very quickly that he could gauge the size of the waves hitting the spot where he was standing just by looking down the coast. He noticed a bit of the coast where the waves hit first and worked out that if the waves were big there, it would be big where he was too. We only realised what he was doing because we'd noticed he was looking off in the distance and sometimes he would start shrieking and running back to me before the waves even rolled in where we stood. Each time he did that, it would turn out to be a big wave. I was quite impressed by that... because Dear Hubby and I never figured that one out at our ripe old age! It made me think that children learn best through experience because that's how it was for our ancestors. They sure didn't have flash cards while struggling to survive in the wilderness and don't we all learn better when we experience something vs just reading about it? I could have shown him pictures and videos of waves and beaches but nothing would trump taking him out to an actual beach.

We had a brilliant time. Even if it had rained cats and dogs for the rest of the holidays or the stupid ash cloud had returned, it still would have been brilliant because Connor had so much fun. I've had fun on the beach before but nothing beats seeing our son getting so much joy out of chasing and being chased by the waves.

My mama!

A really funny thing happened about two days ago. Connor normally sleeps in his cot in his own bedroom and he wakes up about twice in the night, needing me for comfort. His last wake-up time is around 4am++ and I normally take him into our bed where he will then sleep until 7am or so. The happiest threesome ever. :)

That morning, Daddy and Mummy were completely zonked out that morning and were still fast asleep. Connor was already up. He must have taken a look around and thought "Right. I'd better do something or I'll sit here forever and no breakfast!"

So he shook me awake and that woke Daddy up too. He called "Mummy, Mummy!" Opening my eyes, I saw our little boy's happy face and beamed at him. "My baby!" Usually he just gives me a hug or says "Mummy!" back.

But that day, he beamed back and replied "My mama!"

Was too funny for words.

Oodles of noodles

This morning, I was busy running around putting things away and washing the pots and pans. I was rushing because I wanted to take Connor out for walkies in Bangsar Shopping Centre. Okay, I lied. It was because MUMMY wanted very much to go to Mothercare in Bangsar and check the sale out as she's not had a chance to yet.

Surprisingly, Connor was behaving himself. He was sitting in the hall and I'd left the telly on to BBC News which is a channel he loves to watch in the morning. But he'd been too good for too long. Which can only mean one thing. He must be up to no good. I know every mum reading this is nodding her head because she knows what I'm talking about.

I quickly dried my hands on a tea towel and hurried out to check on him.

Turned out he'd gotten his hands on this half-eaten pack of Mamee snack noodles. I'd been snacking on it yesterday and must have forgotten to toss it. He'd scattered the remainder of the pack onto the carpet so there were itty-bitty bits of crunchy noodle curls everywhere and as I approached, I saw that he was picking it up bit by bit and saying delightedly, "Noooooodle!" before putting each bit into his mouth and crunching away happily.

*pengsan*

Sibling rivalry in the making

Got my first inkling of what sibling rivalry will be like if we ever decide to have another baby.

Connor has a plush lamb from his Nana that we call Lamby. (What else?) Connor's not much into soft toys but I know he quite likes Lamby. From time to time, he'll rummage through the bin where we keep all his soft toys and he'll only ever pull Lamby out. Then he'll hug and kiss Lamby all over and come to show me the toy. "Mummy! Lamby!" Aw. How sweet.

Anyway about 2 days ago, Connor and Lamby were on our bed. Connor was having a little morning nen-nen. I'm trying to wean him off the breast but it's taking a long time. Once we were done, Connor slid off the bed.

I picked Lamby up, pretended to put him to my breast and asked Connor "Can Lamby have some nen-nen too?"

Connor just freaked out. His eyes filled with tears, his little face crumpled up and he ran to me, pulling Lamby off while crying "Mummy, Mummy!"

I guess we better stick to Plan B which is a Lab puppy.

That Thing You Do! - Connor and the cat food Evidence Gallery

Ladies and gentlemen, I present you Exhibit A - Caught in the act.

Baby Sign Language: Connor makes up his own sign

It was our afternoon drawing time together and I asked Connor "Would you like your crayons?" Big enthusiastic nod from my 18-month-old son. I got down the bag of crayons and offered it to him. He picked out one crayon and I did the same. We both sat down at his little table and he started making broad sweeps across the paper with his crayon.


He looked up at me enquiringly after that and I asked "What?" He said "Mummy!", then signed "Help" and followed that with the same broad sweeping movements he'd made earlier when drawing. It was very clear what he wanted. "Do you want Mummy to help you draw some things?" Connor beamed at me and nodded, very pleased that he'd managed to tell me what he wanted and that I understood him perfectly.


I was so happy that he'd made up his own sign on the spot to communicate with me. If you read the books on baby sign language, this is common among babies who have been exposed to it. They either make up their own or combine known signs to make up new words. One little boy signed "bird-horse" when he saw a flying unicorn in the toy store. Clever eh!

So relieved Connor's neurons are firing after all. And so happy that he can more or less "talk" to me.